I suffer from a delusion that so many of us suffer from. We stare at a smoke screen all day and allow it to make us believe we are in control. But it's all a lie. I would like to believe I have control over my relationships, my career, my house, my world, but I don't. I can't control the other person in my relationships. Not their thoughts, feelings. Opinions, or behavior. I can only control mine. I don't control my career. They could make MORE budget cuts right now, and I could lose my job. I can't even control my drive to work. There are so many variables: traffic conditions, weather conditions, road conditions, other drivers, etc. My house is a mess right now. I could clean it and make it spotless, but my son and dog could go behind me and destroy all the work I put in... Here is the point... I have no control over anything or anyone. I only get to control me: my thoughts(I haven't figured that one out yet), my choices, my behavior. There's a possibility that my choices could domino and effect other things, but there's no guarantee... And that is where I need work. "ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE" how much time and energy have I wasted on things I can not change? So today. Right now, I'm going to take a deep breath and release those things (there's one in particular I have mind right now). I have to leave it up to fates the universe, or god, or whatever is out there. I have to trust that whatever happens is meant to be, and every experience is an opportunity to learn and grow and stretch myself beyond my comfort zone. And right this second, I choose to do that. So I'm going to lay my head on my pillow and breathe, because thAt is something I can control. I will just rest in the knowledge that I haven't lost control because it was never mine to begin with.
So good night world. Breathe easy tonight and choose to let go... Right along with me
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